Femdom play is also about the decorum. By decorating your house and dressing for the occasion, you set the tone not just for the specific scene but for the relationship as a whole. Obviously in a 24 seven relationship you cannot spend all day dressed up. As in every relationship, there will be special moments (the equivalent to “date night” in a vanilla relationship) and some moments that could rather be considered casual.
Sometimes life gets hectic and then neither my slave nor I have the time and energy to fully dedicate ourselves to the dynamic. This does not mean that he is relieved from his obligations, that is, his obedience, but that there is a spectrum when it comes to dedication and focus.
This is why I set a somewhat specific rule. Whenever I dress up in the style that is particularly appealing to the slave and expresses dominance, this life also has to make a an extra effort with regard to his behavior. In particular this applies to the following kinds of clothes:
- Any pieces made from leather, latex or PVC
- High heels, sexy boots
- “Little black dress” kind of dresses
- Corsets or belt around the waist
- Lingerie
Here is an important lesson for all slaves: the more you take care of chores around the house, the more time your Mistress has to dress up. That’s a superpower you have – use it wisely!
Of my slave I expect that he is consistently well-groomed. In our relation-ship, I am the captain, whereas he is the sailor. That’s why he wears his sailor uniform a lot when we are at home.
In a 24/7 Femdom relationship, you must also account for the time spent outside the house. While I can wear the outfits pictured above on many occasions ranging from a casual lunch to a party night, my slave also needs the wear the relationship dynamic in public somehow – although maybe not always a sailor uniform. If we go out on a Saturday night, I sometimes make him wear leather pants. While this is unusual for a guy to wear in public, there are no real social repercussions in doing so. In other settings, I make him wear his cockcage (super sexy in combination with e.g. suit pants – when the bulge is slightly visible), and/or a buttplug (either just a small plug, or the full gear with harness). Another accessory that conveys submissiveness are leather handcuffs. They can be added to almost any outfit, and reinforce the dynamic, be it at the cinema, the restaurant, or the bar.
A simple rule for you to use
In our Femdom relationship, we established a rule. No matter what, we will both each wear one piece or accessory that represents our dynamic. Usually, that will be the cockcage for him and the necklace with the keys for me. But it can also be a leather item for either of us.
It’s a simple rule that can be lived very easily, no matter what the circumstances are. The import thing about is that it created commitment to the dynamic.
Statement shirts and tops
If you want to dress appropriately for Femdom play, you should also check out my line of clothing. My shirts and tops for female dominants can easily be worn in public. Combine that for instance with a biker jacket, leather leggings or a skirt and you get a dominant, yet sexy look. Slaves can publicly show their willingness to serve by wearing shirts from my slave clothing line. Who know, maybe a Mistress will approach you!
The ultimate symbol
One thing my slave still has the earn: the collar. But more on this in another post.
This corner respectfully suggests that the basic rule is simply this: Mistress (or The Alpha) is in full control. As a result, She wears the clothing She wishes to wear. If Her preference is to be sexy and “turn on” Her slave, She will do so. Either by instinct or inquiry, She will know just what clothing, attitude and treatment gets the results She wants from Her slave.
If, on the other hand, Mistress prefers to be comfortable and forego visual excitement, She will wear whatever She wants (same rule, you notice?) Canny Alpha that She is, She may ask what turns Her man on — or She may not have to. Individual mileage may vary, as they say.
Likewise, Mistress will dress Her slave-boy to Her taste. Ane he will like it, because that’s what he is: a slave. She may opt for total nudity, except for collar, cuffs and cage, at Her pleasure. She may add a hoof, blindfold or whatever, if She wishes. She may decide to dress him any way that amuses Her, because that is the name of the game.
Ot has been this worm’s experience that Feminizing, dressing the male as a Female, may inflate the slave’s image of itself as a member of the Divine and Dominant gender, and give it airs above its station. The notion that dressings a male as a Female is humiliating is based on the notion that Females are inferior 00 a patent falsehood that Femdom exists to stamp out. Dress Your slave as the wretched sub-human that it is, and never let it forget that fact of life in the Femdom Paradise. A naked slave is more efficiently whipped if it has no clothing to protect its hide from the lash. Nakedness equals poverty, vulnerability and status like an animal. Mistress might ask Herself, isn’t that the way things are supposed to be?